Magic and Mayhem (and the Deadline)
May 06, 2025
Esther messaged me last night after reading through the Azamra landing page:
WOW. I wish I could do this. I’m just not ready yet. But iyH one day. I’m blown away. So happy for the next generation. KUDOS TO YOU. Truly an inspiration.
So many of you have written back after the last few emails, telling me how much you laughed, how much they resonated, and how you love your kids and their chaos a little more because of it all.
Because on the inside we’re all a little magic, mayhem, and madness...But on the outside we hope we’re selling mastery.
And at Azamra, it seems we are.
But here’s the truth, for me, it's the mayhem and the madness that are the mastery.
Because real creation doesn’t start with order, it starts with tohu vavohu, with formlessness and depth.
With wind hovering, with breath stirring the chaos.
That’s how Hashem began this world.
That’s how every holy thing begins.
I printed out last year’s training timetables this morning and had such a good laugh
Because what actually happened on any of those days?
Not even close to what I had planned.
For illustration purposes:
This is what I had planned:
Right next to some screenshots of what actually went down:
The minute I walked into the space, my careful plans spontaneously erupted into flame - no spells needed.
The room was just that magical.
It was laughter,
And grace,
And serendipity,
And wild holy timing.
We co-created the most client centered, heart sourced, soul fed, Torah anchored curriculum...And we never wanted it to end
(It didn’t. Our first cohort’s still going strong. We schmooze every day. We have a member in Poland taking our names to kvarim as you read this. Another breathing her kids on the beach. And yes, there’s a special membership plan in the works for students who want to go even deeper into the breath, the song, and the service.)
Behind the scenes, our staff chat is called Azamra: Wizards of AZ
There are five of us planning every detail of what's about to emerge in that space. We’re all about the magic, the mayhem, the mischief, the madness, and the music... But we’ll never tell you who’s whom. (Although I’m probably the dragon. Or the fool. Or both.)
Even though I mapped out a whole new plan for this year, I already know what’s coming.
The same sacred undoing
The same holy rebuild
The same wild breath-led Torah of becoming
And I’m already giggling at the Azamra cohort's WhatsApp group, already in awe of the people stepping in.
Their stories
Their dreams
Their passion
Their purpose
Usually I get nervous before trainings; not this time.
Oh sure, my dreams are trippy - The portals of transformation are already open.
My kids have been very "extra" (kids always feel it)
But mostly I’m just excited
Because when the breath is flowing
When the Torah is alive
When people show up with their full hearts
Everything’s figureoutable
What's not figureoutable for me is ambiguity. Which is why applications get locked down tonight.
Once we close, we're locked and loaded. And then we ride.
One student, Raisy, said she’s here for the rollercoaster.
She has no idea what she’s in for
(Of course she’s already waking up to find birds perched inside her house… divine messengers… and it only gets wonkier from there)
After that it’s choo choo (as Nitsan likes to say)
Applications for the next round won’t open again until Pesach 2026.
And so much can happen in a year
You can become someone entirely new, you can finally remember the song only you came to sing
Or stay the same
Choo choo,
Fally
- Personal update. Deeds is now into dinosaurs. Not instead of dragons. Just… also dinosaurs. He told me very seriously that I should never breathe them....
Because they probably .
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