Priorities
Nov 19, 2025
A friend recently gently called me out at my woeful levels of availability when it comes to coffee dates and hikes and phone calls and friendship in general.
She wasn’t wrong about my absence. It’s been a brutal few months, and I tried explaining the level of exhaustion I’m carrying; how some days it takes everything I have to draw on eyeliner and smile for the next Zoom.
And she said, “But if friendship meant something to you, you’d prioritize it.”
I was left feeling a little wounded, and I wasn’t sure why.
Maybe I was feeling a little called out?
Like maybe I really am not that good of a friend?
Like maybe I should care more, be around more, do more, reach out more?
But I can’t.
I literally can’t right now.
It’s not that I don’t prioritize friendships. It’s just that friendship is lower on the priority list at the moment because I’m busy needing to prioritize ten other things that she’s lucky enough not to understand.
I stewed on that during Deeds' entire Friday afternoon bath last week.
Until I realized that with everything going on, I still manage to show up for my learning commitment every day.
I wake up early for it. I go to bed late for it. I listen in the car for it. At every red light and highway mile and walk to the gym.
Because it lights me up. It fills me up. And G-d knows I need that right now.
It might be true that if my friends were willing to meet me at 5:45am I could make them a priority instead. But they prioritize sleep. And I really love my alone time with the Sages on the Pages.
We all prioritize things we love. Things that bring us joy,
It’s not about having the same priorities as everyone else. It’s about knowing what yours are and why they matter.
We don’t all stand on the same floor, and our limitations aren't all trying to break through the same ceiling. We can all prioritize the same things and in different ways at different times.
The real ones out there will love you where you’re at.
What’s more important is loving yourself where you’re at.
There are times for compromise. And then there are times to hold our ground. Even when its shaky ground. Maybe especially then.
The ones who love us will be there to make sure we don't fall. The ones who care for us will be there to keep us in balance. The ones we have yet to become will cheer us on.
What's important is knowing what’s worth making a priority. We’ll always make time for what we value, for what we love.
Do we love ourselves enough to listen to what our soul is screaming for?
I’ve always been a do-gooder. A peacemaker. A people pleaser.
And then there were times, where despite my best efforts, G-d has refused to let me slide into my sweats and slink back into the shadows. He’s pushed me to the front of the crowd, shone bright lights in my eyes, and not let up until I said something true. No matter who was listening.
Have you listened lately?
To yourself, I mean?
To the voice inside you that knows what's true for you?
That loves you enough to guide you on the path that is yours alone?
What can you do today towards honoring that voice? Towards bringing more of that higher knowing into your world?
Based on the overwhelming response I received after last week's Time Out email, I'm guessing we all need permission sometimes.
For today, take sixty seconds.
Put a hand on your heart, and take a slow breath in.
Ask yourself, without pressure, without judgment,
What do I actually need today?
Not what you should need. Not what someone else wants from you.
Just the truth.
Write down the first thing that comes.
And do one thing, a tiny thing, that moves you towards that.
If you're in Vessel, you'll recognize the tone of that little exercise. It's a little snippet of what we've been doing together. Learning how to tap into an embodied wisdom the world has taken us so far away from.
And if you're looking for more of it - Ignite, my yearly course on the Embodied Feminine, is launching soon. There's a small window of opportunity where I'll be giving early registrants a significant discount... you'll want to keep an eye on your inbox for that!
Breathe a little more today.
Everything else can wait. 
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Life happens in little bits. Learn to love the little bytes.
